Our Way of Life Pt.1

“There are two types of dogs in this world, pet dogs and stray dogs. Stray dogs; which in exchange for their freedom, wander in the rain and eat the food of uncertainty. Or pet dogs, which wear a collar and do nothing but eat the food of subjugation.” — Samurai Champloo

Being the odd-ball/ anti-conformist for most of my life; I am yet to wear on my sleeve the very creativity that has made this so, producing a plethora of songs and ideas that have seldom seen the light of day. It has even taken me a long time after deciding to blog, to actually blog — why? Well, procrastination (laziness) and fear are easily two sides of the same coin. As such, I deem myself to be a stray dog who has always lacked the courage to be a stray dog, literally limiting myself as a result of my agreeable nature. However the more I've grown in wisdom, knowledge, and understanding, the more I've come to realize the pointlessness of being respected for who you’re not.

“Why don’t you just continue to work and earn your money, save for a rainy day, one day you'll look back and be thankful, work hard while you’re still young. Look at how people are struggling and suffering, there are many back home who would kill to have your opportunity” etc etc… Said my Nigerian parents in summary.

While true; the irony here is that continuing to work hard at what I'm doing now (support work) will have me working hard and earning relatively at the same age as them (50s). Unless of course, I move up the ladder and eventually build my own business in care — by which this process would be even harder; so why go through either route if the field of work, while enjoyable, doesn't necessarily make me tick? Furthermore, should it be the case that I pass before the ‘rainy day’, what was all the work then for? Heck! I'm alive for the ‘rainy day’ and I've had to use my hard-earned money (time) to remain safe and secure, only to repeat the same process?? I have no qualms with this, except for the complacency that comes from putting more time and effort into plan B, while deluding yourself into thinking that you’ll eventually do it for plan A.

Spirituality

Money is a means to an end, needless to say, it is important for our survival, not so much our spiritual needs though.

If I haven't already lost you with the word ‘spiritual’, I define it as unexplained science pertaining to ethics; any extra layer of reality we can’t see with the naked eye, nor the initial capabilities of the other 4 senses — metaphysics if you will. Colours we can’t see, scents we can’t smell, frequencies we can’t hear, flavors we can’t taste, and matter we passively interact with, yet are all ever under the influence, and presence of — fall under my definition.

I am by no means insinuating that the ‘spiritual’ is just an external force beyond our control, but that as the body and mind are interconnected, so too (within that relationship) are the aspects of our being that we are ignorant of. One cannot be effected without affecting the others.

Generally speaking; our everyday lives are a spiritual experience, however, we only define it as such when our state shifts due to particular stimuli, disrupting the ‘norm’ and giving us the awareness through accentuated senses to simultaneously experience more of the breadth and depth which make up reality. Specifically speaking: spirituality is the mode by which we ought to assess ourselves existentially.

To clarify, in regards to living in truth; I describe social media as the most real VR (Virtual Reality) game, because although not “real”, we by the majority struggle to distinguish the reality from it and treat it as though it is. So much so that despite this knowledge, the effect is usually the same in the way we build and place importance on our profiles, and are constantly affected by how the rest of the world engage with our content — as if it actually reflects the truth of how they really feel. Yet by now, it is a ‘woke’ cliche to understand that the lives people portray on their socials, bare little to no resemblance to their truth in “real life”. Therefore; supposing that our reality isn’t the ‘final’ or ‘main’ layer, and there's already disparity between the one we were born into and our Instagrams; who is to then say that “this reality” bares complete resemblance in truth to the layer(s) I've just described previously as ‘spiritual’?

I argue that in order for one to live in truth or walk ‘the way’, there must, in essence, be interelated coherence on every layer of their reality. Transparent and unfettered.

The significance of this in relation to one's philosophy is simply that; if one is concerned with doing so (arguing their truth), it should be taken into account when pondering on the matter, and to successfully do so, must be understood.

Being a British citizen in such times of ‘peril’; people dying of Covid, the economy dying of Covid, people losing their jobs left, right, and center — why on earth would anyone want to willingly quit their job, let alone cut down their work hours if they were blessed enough to be in my position?… normally if I had a financially secure plan, it’d be fine, but in this abnormal context with a creative venture as my contingency, it's seemingly financial suicide.

Maybe I live in a bubble; safe and protected from the horrors of today's current climate. Relatively in life I've suffered trivially and haven't lost anyone close to me except my dog (still suffered nonetheless).

Potentially, I'm ungrateful: for the roof over my head, WiFi, cooked food for breakfast, lunch, and dinner, my laid back well-paying job, my middle-class neighborhood. Or maybe — I've been deluded by one too many ‘Steve Job’ stories about how an individual drop-out said “Fuck it”, and built their own multi-billion dollar business. Well — while such stories are a cliche… cliches are cliches for a reason.

Ok but surely not everybody that's stupid (or brave) enough to take the high road becomes successful. Some do and will die in complete obscurity. We usually only see or hear about the ones that ‘make it’, not the ones that ended up flat broke, depressed, drug-addicted, or just a shell of the man they used to be. So then why does one do it?

Existential Grounds

As I tried to explain the motivations behind my impaired reasoning, I realized that while it wasn't only unintelligible to my parents, the reason behind that misunderstanding itself I believe (ignorance aside) was because we lived by completely different philosophies, and one's philosophy (guiding principle), aware of it or not, is the existential grounds for which their identity and world view is built upon.

The Christian way; I believe at least encourages responsibility and the endurance of long-suffering, with the promise of a utopia afterward… not being of the same faith however, I don't have that luxury, so must therefore have reason to do the same, whilst also making every effort to make the only life I may have, my own utopia.

Existential ground, in essence, i define as what the individual fundamentally believes to be true, as assesed more through action, not arbituary inference. The dogmas constructed within the depths of our own psyches.

The existential ground may somewhat give you the image of a celestial floor, something beneath us that our egos can nonetheless walk upon. However, if you are to entertain my proposition here, I would rather you thought of it more as the source or origin that provides the necessary components required for ones ‘sense of self’ to remain intact, as opposed to dispersing (due to lack of source) into something formless (un-definitive). Therefore, considering that animals who seemingly lack, or are void of a ‘sense of self’ can still take action, I believe that an ‘existential ground’ in and of itself is just another psychological construct for survival. For without it, we who are blessed and cursed with self-awareness, will suffer consequences unfavorable to ourselves and others.

The Trade-Off

I don't always know what's gonna happen — sometimes I don't even know what I want. But I do know what I don't want, and that's more of the same without change! Either way, I won't know until I try.

My way of life in part, so to speak, is predicated on the evidential truth that life is a series of ultimatums (at least from a glass half empty point of view), or perhaps that: you’ll always have to choose between having your cake, and eating it — doing both never works.

The trade-off therefore in regards to career and well-being is this: Take the easier route in the short term and suffer in the long term. Or take the harder route in the short term, and prosper long term. For example, you wish to be fit and healthy — we don't have magic genies so not exercising and always choosing the chocolate bars over the fruits, will have your health and fitness deteriorate in the long term, vice versa in this case, when you choose to inconvenience (work-out) yourself in the present, you exchange it for the attainment of your physical well being over the long-term.

Question: Why follow the herd?

Short term and long term are relative and vary depending on the given context, however, the generalized pattern is that most people (if without reason) choose the more expedient route in regards to everything, and in the worst case; do so simply because others do it. So one's reason in and of itself must be larger than the present inconvenience in order to choose otherwise.

This is reflective for example in our economical hierarchies, supplemented by the fact that we are herd animals.

Now assuming one has enough faith to even imagine their dream job being a possibility, the manifestation of such (if socially acceptable) usually boasts not only excellence but competency that can only be parallel to those we as a society consider “successful!”.

Unfortunately, not only does the average person lack sufficient discipline to bridge the gap between them and their miraged goals, but they also have to deal with the evolutionary magnetism of the herd, which; even if you were a maverick of sorts, is given momentum by our innate fear of failure and loneliness, which is counter-intuitively sponsored by our very own societal values: financial security and status (to name a few) that pertain to ‘success’.

For a while yes —the prevailing pattern dictates that we will be financially insecure and drag our status through the mud long before success is even within sight.

To quote Drake: ‘How do you expect to stand out by fitting in?’, and of course, for there to be a herd (majority), there must also be strays (minorities). The bigger the distinction between difficulty, the more likely we are to take the expedient route. Only a few have an inclination to do so by way of temperament, or extreme nurture — imagine both! In addition, it's essentially the principle that underpins high risk, high reward, low risk, low reward. So logically if one is to prosper… well It's as Joseph Campbell said “The cave you fear to enter the most holds the treasure you seek”.

Suppose you accept my world view in this regard as true; despite the rational choice being to enter the cave if you want prosperity — the truth simply is you don’t always know for sure if you’ll come back, I mean people genuinely don’t because they’re not always strong enough to slay the dragon… but I mean what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger ay. In a nutshell, it’s always going to be a gamble, therefore one must be resolved with the means to achieve their desired end.

Question 2: Would you rather be Rick or Jerry?

From the outside, the nefarious genius's life looks glamourous — but would you reaaally want to be dealing with extraterrestrial creatures daily? Your life hanging in the balance, daily? Not to mention his clear emotional dysfunctionality which arguably is what allows him to do what he does. To say the least, it’s not for the Jerry’s of the world.

People from all walks of life have different reasons for taking the high road, but they all share one thing in common: a ‘Worthy’ cause.

In the latter sequel of ‘Our Way of Life’ ill delve more into the significance of the ‘worthy’ aspect, nevertheless, while I do enjoy the odd excursions with friends wherever to the bar, out of town, or the cerebral abstractions reached through recreational means; rarely, after years of this do I truly feel alive living in complete luxury, ever less so as I dwindle on the fence and become complacent in admiration of those venturing into the unknown, daring to fail, and mashing work on the field. Whether it be those in the midst of a trial, or those eating the bittersweet fruits of their labor, their stories are far more interesting relative to mine. I get bored after a matter of seconds watching anyone to my rear, and at least feel empathy for those at my sides.

In hindsight, I'm grateful for the experiences I've had thus far and would go to the cinema to watch that movie, however, I would probably leave with an unsettling sense of ambivalence, and a bunch of “what ifs” in regards to what the protagonist chose at crucial moments.

Anyway, in no way am I saying that those who live an ‘average’ or meek lifestyle have no sense of fulfillment, joy, or their own personal struggles. There are plenty of ‘other side's’ for which ‘the grass is greener’, and we all at every level have our own scenarios for which we've chosen to jump the fence. However, I argue that if something is not growing, it is dying. The sense of joy and fulfillment derived from jumping fence ‘x’, will not be the same the 5th, 6th, 7th time, and so on. Put simply; a game that ceases to be challenging isn’t worth playing anymore, nor that of which the challenge gradually decreases. To me, It seems to be the case that the fence must get higher as your own spirit gets taller, in order for one to remain in some way as a child on the playground, as opposed to an adult, apathetic to the lack of novelty in their lives.